Sweet memories of a wonderful person, Pat Haley

Aunt Pat –
Always a positive attitude

My name is Kevin Neal, son of Floyd Neal.  My Dad and my auntie Pat were very close.

Although not biological brother and sister, my Dad and Pat, had a brother/sister-type bond that lasted their entire lives; including now, reunited together again, in Heaven.

My Dad is from Oklahoma originally and hopped a freight train to California when he was only 14 years old. The only family he knew, for the most part, in California was Pat and aunt Rosalie.

Because these three wonderful people were so close-in-age, they spent their early lives growing up together as kids themselves.  Each of them would tell their various versions of stories of childhood mischief, and you can always tell there were some additional details that weren’t meant for public consumption.  It was their secret and we, as their kids, never probed too much.

Uncle Al –
Loving picture to Pat

As I mentioned, Dad left Oklahoma and arrived in California at the age of 14 and he didn’t start a family until the age of 49. So, I would consider that the ‘golden ages’ of when this was a time when Dad and Pat created a lot of those wonderful memories and forever unknown mischief they stirred-up.  I guess we can forgive them.  Personally, I think they all thought themselves as serious rebels, but I think their version of being a rebel might be as terribly awful *sarcasm* as getting caught smoking a cigarette back in the day.

Then, after I was born, I will fondly remember how kind and considerate both Aunt Pat and Uncle Al were with hosting family events such as BBQ’s and reunions. As young kids we were just having naïve fun, but I think the adults really appreciated their time together very much.

I’ll never forget the fun times the Neal and Haley families would spend camping and watering skiing at Lake Camanche.  These were really special times where us kids made some amazing memories of our own with some of our own exclusion of public consumption! 😊

Pat had, and has, (I don’t like to use the past tense word like ‘had’ because Pat, and Al, both have strong legacies that will live on forever) an incredible zest for life.  This is an extremely special quality of aunt Pat.  She always had a smile on her face, a positive attitude and was so encouraging to others.

Aunt Pat –
Always family first

She has this amazing gift to turn a negative comment into a positive outlook somehow. For example, someone might make an innocent comment such as “it’s raining today so it’s going to be an awful day”.  Aunt Pat, with her quick and witty humor, would respond with something such as “well, at least I won’t have to water the garden, it’s going to be wonderful day, right?”.  And I’ll never forget how the inflection of her voice at the end of sentences was always up-beat and full of life and energy.  Pat is an amazingly strong person and I will always admire her strength, humor and wisdom.

As I was driving up from San Jose to Carmichael this morning, I was trying to think of all the right words to share with you today to summarize the beautiful life and legacy of our beloved aunt Pat but, honestly, I couldn’t encapsulate the essence of her accurately.

Then, flipping through the radio stations in my car, I came across a song that perfectly spoke the words I was looking for, and the essence of Pat’s life.

It was a country song called “Buy Dirt” by Jordan Davis. Here is a link to the YouTube video: https://youtu.be/AKec3LTILRU.  I’m not a huge country music fan so for me to stop and listen to this song, on this station, had to be some kind of divine intervention!

The lyrics especially hit-home with me because this is what Pat loved most which was to live a peaceful life on ‘dirt’ with her partner (Al and their children), watch grass grow, witness kids grow up, and be a decent person because ‘it all goes quick’.

I think Aunt Pat appreciated every moment of life much more than most of us, because she knew it all goes quick.  She took in every moment, and gave in every moment, with incredible compassion and sincerity.

God Bless Auntie Pat. We love you!

-Kevin Neal

*********************************************

“Buy Dirt” by Jordan Davis lyrics

A few days before he turned 80
He was sittin’ out back in a rocker
He said, “What you been up to lately?”
I told him, “Chasing a dollar”
And in between sips of coffee
He poured this wisdom out
Said, “If you want my two cents on making a dollar count

Buy dirt
Find the one you can’t live without
Get a ring, let your knee hit the ground
Do what you love but call it work
And throw a little money in the plate at church
Send your prayers up and your roots down deep
Add a few limbs to your family tree
And watch their pencil marks
And the grass in the yard all grow up”

‘Cause the truth about it is
It all goes by real quick
You can’t buy happiness
But you can buy dirt

Before you get caught on that ladder
Let me tell you what it’s all about
Find you a few things that matter
That you can put a fence around
And then he laid it out

Buy dirt
Find the one you can’t live without
Get a ring, let your knee hit the ground
Do what you love but call it work
And throw a little money in the plate at church
Send your prayers up and your roots down deep
And add a few limbs to your family tree
And watch their pencil marks
And the grass in the yard all grow up

‘Cause the truth about it is
It all goes by real quick
You can’t buy happiness
But you can buy dirt

You can buy dirt
And thank the good Lord for it
‘Cause He ain’t makin’ any more of it

So buy dirt
Find the one you can’t live without
Get a ring, let your knee hit the ground
Do what you love but call it work
And throw a little money in the plate at church
Send your prayers up and your roots down deep
Add a few limbs to your family tree
And watch their pencil marks
And the grass in the yard all grow up

‘Cause the truth about it is
It all goes by real quick
You can’t buy happiness
But you can buy dirt

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Virginia Lee ‘Bunny’ (Harmon) Stites

Oct. 20, 1940 – Jan. 15, 2022

The immediate family held a graveside Service for Virginia Lee “Bunny” (Harmon) Stites, 81, of Sallisaw, at 10:30 a.m. on Tuesday, Jan. 18, 2022, at Sallisaw City Cemetery under the direction of Agent Mallory Martin Funeral Service, Inc.

Virginia Lee “Bunny” (Harmon) Stites, age, 81, died peacefully in her home in Sallisaw on Saturday, Jan. 15, 2022. She was a 1958 graduate of Sallisaw High School and later went on to earn a Bachelor of Science in Education from Northeastern State University in Tahlequah. After high school, she married Herbert Wayne Stites and they raised three children. She worked for over 50 years at Stites Oil Company, Stites Farms, and the Agricultural Stabilization and Conservation Service Office (ASCS) in Sallisaw. After the death of Herbert, she married Max Nimmo in 2002.

Bunny was a loving mother and grandmother and cherished every moment she had with family and friends. She was an avid reader and loved a good crossword puzzle, but nothing entertained her more than watching Oklahoma Sooner football and OKC Thunder basketball. She loved Jesus and had a wonderful relationship with Him. She will be missed by all who knew her.

She is survived by her three sons, Michael Wayne, Richard Darren and Phillip Craig; and her six grandchildren, Seth, Nick, Nate, Sophie, Will and Stella. She also leaves behind a host of family and friends that she loved and cherished dearly. She was preceded in death by her parents, Audra (Williams) Harmon and Richard Jewell Harmon; her sister, Betty (Harmon) Lowe; and husbands, Herbert Wayne Stites and Waylon Max Nimmo.

Active pallbearers were Seth Stites, Nick Stites, Nate Stites and Will Stites.
Viewing was 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. Monday at Agent Mallory Martin Funeral Home in Sallisaw.
Memorial donations may be made to First United Methodist Church, 2100 McGee, Sallisaw, OK 74955.

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Coronavirus (COVID-19) in Santa Clara County

Friends, family and strangers reading this blog today, tomorrow or in the future,

I’m writing this blog post to try and capture the mood of our local community in Santa Clara County, but also though out the world wide. To sum up the situation, all businesses that are deemed “non-essential” are closed to any in-personal interaction. This includes dine-in restaurants, schools, parks and anywhere a group of 10 or more people are likely to gather.

The Coronavirus (a.k.a. COVID-19) is a highly infectious virus that, as far as we know at the time of this blog post, originated somewhere in China and has spread across the globe infecting millions and killing tens-of-thousands thus far.

According to most experts, the ‘surge’ of cases for infection and death of Coronavirus is predicted to dramatically escalate over the next few weeks. Santa Clara County has been on a voluntary ‘shelter-in-place’ order by our local government since early March 2020. Since then the county has begun to enforce the order for places such as restaurants who continue to offer dine-in services or beauty salons who continue to serve their customers.

It’s really a tough situation right now because these small businesses cannot survive being without paying customers for even a short period of time so they push the limits of a public safety order. On the other hand, people’s lives are a top priority and some people question whether such drastic extremes as ‘shelter-in-place’, instead of just ‘social distancing common sense’ are really necessary.

Fortunately, there are now some federal government stimulus money being promised to small business owners, however they are already having major problems with implementing a simple approval process and/or approval workflow.

I, personally, just cringe at how ineffective our government is when it comes to offer services back to the very needy taxpayers because my business is all about work-process automation. These problems I see every day, plain as day, can be easily solved at a fraction of the budget; if you just remove the politics. So I won’t hold my breath.

As you can image, it’s an unreal situation trying to live your normal life with so many restrictions but if it’s for the greater sake of humanity then, from at least what I’ve observed, most people have been totally compliant which is absolutely heart-warming to me. It’s an unbelievable time that you need to have empathy, compassion and patience with others.

After being locked in the house for nearly 1 month solid I told Brandee I wanted to take a night-walk to the store just to experience the activity level on a Spring night, on the weekend in California. I can tell you what I experienced in my walk to the store was remarkable! There is little activity on a usually busy Saturday night. I walked down the middle of what typically is a busy road, with only one car encounter. Also, there was only one airplane that I noticed taking-off from the San Jose International Airport and there was general no sign of life in the outside world.

I’m proud of my fellow community to observe the shelter-in-place order to help slow the spread of the virus. However, at some point we have to balance the risk versus the negative impact to society for social isolation. As I walked to the store this evening in the silence of the night all I could think of was this song remake from the band Distributed entitled “The Sound of Silence”.

Stay safe, stay healthy and stay positive everyone!

Sincerely,

Kevin

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Charles Edward Utley (September 1, 1926 – August 14, 2018)

Chuck Utley

Chuck Utley

Charles “Chuck” Utley, passed away peacefully on August 14, 2018 in Los Altos, CA. Chuck was born September 1, 1926 in Buffalo, NY and was the devoted husband and best friend of Cornelia van der Voort, who he affectionately called “Neil”. He is survived by sons, Robert B. Utley, and his wife Elisabeth of Sydney, Australia, Nelson V. Utley, and his wife Barbara of Cupertino, CA, and Charles A. Utley, and his wife Teresa of Campbell, CA. He also leaves behind much-loved grandsons, Nicholas and Lucas and precious granddaughter, Emily.

Chuck was the son of Charles Bach Utley and Kate (Phelps) Utley. As an only child, he grew up in Buffalo, NY until enlisting in the U.S. Navy during WWII and serving as a signalman on landing crafts in the South Pacific. He graduated from Williams College, Willamstown, MA in 1949. Chuck began his marketing career in Buffalo at Sattlers, a pioneering discount department store, moving later to building products manufacturer National Gypsum Company. He then joined Whitney Seed Company, maker of lawn and garden products, where he was responsible for marketing and advertising. He met his future wife at the wedding of a mutual friend in 1950 and they were married three years later at Neil’s family home in Fredonia, NY and then settling in East Aurora, NY.

In 1963 he moved his sales and marketing experience from Buffalo to Rumrill-Hoyt Advertising in Rochester, NY, where he became an account supervisor and vice president. Feeling the need for change in 1970, Chuck joined Robert Ebey Company Advertising in Menlo Park, CA but not before the family made a memorable cross-country automobile trip to their new home in Los Altos. He spent the next 20 years helping guide what became Ebey, Utley & Company through the economic ups and downs of Silicon Valley and assisted in the marketing successes of many of the area’s important commercial, financial and technology companies.

Throughout his life, Chuck enjoyed travel, barbershop quartet singing, skiing, musical theater, reading, cheering on the ’49ers and attempting to master the banjo. He was a consummate handy-man, ready to take on anything around the house. Above all, Chuck loved his wife, his sons and their families, and admired the character, accomplishments and joys they continually gave him. He will be forever remembered as a caring husband, extraordinary dad/granddad and passionate community volunteer who lived life to the fullest.

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Life updates, 8/11/2018

It’s been a very busy last few months at the Neal Casa. We’ve been busy with life, business and reflection.

As I get older my dad continues to get smarter and smarter. He said time with friends and family is the most precious thing in life, and he was absolutely right.

RJ’s Legacy

RJ - A wonderful legacy of a decent person

RJ – A wonderful legacy of a decent person

We lost a great man this past month. RJ was 100 years young and he was really a wonderful man of decency. He was a hard-working guy from Arkansas who was such an inspirational person. RJ was a man of many, many talents including being handy with just about everything including chainsaws, automotive stuff, plumbing or sorting out every day life’s complications.

RJ was a dedicated family man and one of the humblest people I’ve ever met. Every time I would talk with RJ, or about him with others, I always learned some new and interesting activity that he was involved. It was really incredible that this wonderful man lived such a blessed life. I’ve heard stories about hound dogs, honey bees, BBQ and, most importantly, life lessons.

RJ had a special gift to deliver important life lessons without being dramatic. He was the epitome of paying-it-forward for his entire life. He was truly one of the good guys and I sincerely appreciate his friendship. He has left a great legacy and lasting impact on my life forever. God Bless you RJ and thanks for being the perfect person you are.

Five amazing things about this great man are:

  1. Wonderful family man with well-respecting children
  2. A great patriotic person with excellent respect for life, liberty and happiness
  3. Outstanding caretaker for his bee-hives
  4. Terrific knowledge of getting stuff done, know matter what is was
  5. …and most of all, the best guy to get general life advice that is so precious

 

Jackson Update

Our best buddy, Jackson

Our best buddy, Jackson

Brandee and my best buddy, our beloved Jackson, is starting to show his age. As always, he maintains a wonderful spirit and zest for living but his body is failing him and he’s lost a lot of weight recently due to his cancer or possibly diabetes.

We are watching him closely all hours of the day to keep him content and comfortable.

Jack has been our beautiful son since we adopted him in January 2006. He has brought us so much fun and joy. Jack was an amazing younger brother to his older feline sister, Bella. He is also such a wonderful older brother to his two nerdy younger sisters, Gracie and Bleu.

Please pray for Jack and his great spirit.  He is a very special Angel.

Here are several Jackson highlights I would like to share:

  1. He is such a sweet brother to his feline sisters, but he will ferociously defend them if a strange cat comes into our territory
  2. Jack loves to take car-rides and walks outside
  3. He never complains and just loves to be with others
  4. Jack likes peanut butter a lot and also likes when he gets bones to chew
  5. Jack loves to have big social events where family and friends gather together. He is a social butter-fly

 

Business Update

P3iD Technologies, Inc.

P3iD Technologies, Inc.

There are so many fantastic updates to the business that I can’t nearly share them all so let me just say this; we have established a business of Trust.

If you Trust then everything seems to find a way to work itself out. I am absolutely pleased at the wonderful people that are contributing their skills to build our great company. I am truly humbled by all the support. Also, I cannot express how grateful I am for the support of our fabulous partners.

I’ve had a vision, and openly shared this concept on social media for many years, of a collaborative technology ecosystem and it’s amazing to see it come in to play so quickly. As a quick summary let me please share:

  1. P3iD is now a California Incorporated Company
  2. P3iD has two outstanding additions to our Executive team who are making such a positive impact
  3. P3iD is officially a key contributing member of several technology organizations
  4. P3iD has a solid road map of products for sale now as end-user applications, OEM and for consideration for co-development projects
  5. P3iD is a major Technology Sponsor at an upcoming industry event

Overall, I could not be more pleased with the progress of the business!

As busy as I am, I still want to slow down and share the important things in life. These things are the terrific legacy of RJ. There is nothing more precious than the decency of such a person.

God Bless,

Kevin

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